I wanted to let you know more about Nick's progress.  Since his release from the hospital, he's a new-and-improved son!  He's the son I raised and know, but better.  I am simply shocked at how much difference I see in him!  I never thought it would come out as well as it has.  I was terrified of taking him to the hospital and cried terribly wondering if I was making the right decision when I did take him.  Now I don't regret his hospitalization one single bit.

From what I can tell, Nick was medicated incorrectly to start with.  The Adderall XR 30 mg dosage given THREE times a day by his pediatrician was creating his mania and psychosis.  His antidepressant was also a culprit in the breakdown of Nick.  He just became more and more depressed, then psychotic.  The change from Tegretol over to Depakote was significant...no more hallucinations.  The Risperdal was increased gradually to 6 mg a day and he gained a ton of weight, causing stretch marks he gained so quickly!

Now he's on four medications:  Depakote ER 1500 mg at bedtime; Abilify 10 mg in the morning; Cogentin 0.5 mg twice daily and Risperdal 1 mg ONLY as needed.  He has taken only, at most, 6 mg total in the last two weeks!

Would you believe that now he's happy...laughing and joking again?

We are talking about a child who only less than two months ago hibernated in his room, spitting and raging violently when he did come out.  He stopped all contact with anyone of importance unless it involved playing games on the internet and chatting online.  He wanted to die and tried to stab himself with a kitchen knife!  He used to pull out his hair and would obsess about dirt and germs to the point of bleeding he would pick, tweeze and scrape so much.  He was a cutter.  He wrote dark poems about death.  He believed the Grim Reaper lived in his closet and would insist on sleeping in my bed to avoid it.  The night I decided to take him to the hospital was the night he tried to kill himself and had to pin him down on the kitchen floor, trying not to get hurt with the knife in his hand while my 7yo son called for help.

Now?  Not only is he happy, but he's thriving!  He enjoys his brothers and is very protective of his youngest brother.  He does exactly as he is told with a "yes ma'am".  He does his chores without a fight.  He dances.  He rides his bike.  He talks on the phone with lots of friends and even better...he goes out into the neighborhood to play!  He sleeps all night in his room, soundly.  He listens to better music and stays off the computer for the most part.  It's now a treat...not a lifeline.  He doesn't regard people as enemies.  He uses his problem-solving skills and voices appropriately when he starts to feel agitation.  He removes himself from situations that would create conflicts.  I am so very, very proud of him!  He's now a fine gentleman.

The only difference in what I have done for him was seek intense counseling and psychiatric care more defined for his bipolar disorder.  I have enrolled him in the homebound schooling program that our school system offers so that he can have a teacher come to our home and not have the distractions and frustrations of a brick-and-mortar school.  I am also at home fulltime to "detail" him and give him the attention he needs right now.  And, above all, we found the right combination of medications which is critical to his improvement overall.

I want to thank you and everyone else who offered their support and inspiration during this very difficult time.  I couldn't have done it without you!

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