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music courtesy of "Everytime"
On May 3rd, 1993 my husband and I greeted a beautiful baby boy with lots of jet-black hair and very dark eyes. As time
went on, I discovered that although my son, Kenny, slept through the night, (which was completely awesome!), he always wanted
to be rocked. He moved around all over the place and would get very agitated and cry. Since my arms were about ready to fall
off, and the frustration of not being able to do housework, we did the next best thing and bought him a swing. What a
life savor!
At 9 months, my son started to walk, but it quickly became a run! He was into anything and everything and couldn't
focus for one minute. He was never interested in playing with his toys. He was more interested into getting into my pots and
pans, getting into dresser drawers, my purse, just everything.
At age 2, I started to feel that I was a bad
mother. No matter how I tried to entertain his strong will, it was never good enough. All the while people would say, "What
a cute and active baby you have there", and I thought, "Yeah, he sure is cute!" However, in my heart, I knew that something
was up.
By the time he was three years old I felt so bad about myself as a Mom. I wondered, is there something more
to the story or am I just imagining things? Maybe I had information overload. Maybe I've seen one too many "informational"
TV programs or read too many child behavior books?
By the time my son turned 4, I had decided to take him to see a doctor.
That is when, after filling out forms about his life in almost all aspects and several months of observation, it was determined
that my child had Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, aka "ADHD". Was it a relief? Sure it was! I mean, all this
time I thought I was the problem. However, with that being said, there is much more to his life than I ever thought possible.
Kindergarten
came and went like a calm summer breeze. There were no cares in the world and it was mostly uneventful in that there weren't
any behavioral problems. He was taking Ritalin at the time and it definitely helped with his restlessness. He was able to
focus so much better. It was a miracle for us to see such a positive change. Although my son was only 5, I could tell
he felt good about himself.
When Kenny was in first grade, well, that is when our story makes a huge turn for what
seems so long ago, yet still like yesterday. Entering the first grade was glorious at first, but by November, things became
ugly. Kenny, although on Ritalin, was starting to have some behavioral problems in that he wasn't able to control his temper
very well. His teacher was the type who didn't "bend" much. As I learned later, having a more flexible, easy- going
teacher was a better match. Unfortunately, anything would set him off. He was big on selfishness. He just couldn't help it.
He had to be the first in line. He had to be the first to have the basketball, etc. and he refused to do assignments, punched
his teacher in the nose and twice he hid under a desk and was also banging his head on anything
he could find and had to be carried off by the school nurse and principal. I could not tell you how many times
he was called to the Principals office and the amount of calls I got from the school! You see, they have never had to
deal with such a child before, apparently and well, I didn't know what to tell them..... I felt helpless. I felt sorry
for him. I felt bad that the teachers had to deal with it.
The first counselor he had at the time was not equipped to help him
and they had very few positive sessions. He needed someone more laid back in nature and we found that play therapy was
the key in getting my son to talk about his feelings about himself, his peers and his family. I am happy to say
we found that counselor and it worked out great!
We endured two hospital visits at age 6 and 7 due to his suicidal thoughts. He
tried to jump out of a two-story window in his bedroom, destroyed cherished trophies, chased his sister with a knife, and
other shocking behavior that we just didn't know how to handle at the time. We got tired of not having any answers and decided
it was time to find someone else.
The next Dr. who treated Kenny next turned out to be a miracle worker.
I had the school records documenting every problem they ever had with Kenny. I had the teacher from first grade describe what
had happened in the classroom and beyond, from being punched in the nose to Kenny having a breakdown in the classroom.
This man spent an hour with us. We never spent that length of time with the other doctor. This doctor spent time with me alone,
and then time alone with our son. He was extremely thorough. By the end of the session he told me he could not make a diagnosis
yet, but he suspected my son had early onset Bipolar Disorder and that in the months ahead we would know for sure.
A
year and one more hospital visit later we concluded the Bipolar but also ADHD diagnosis and finally finding the right
antidote of medications (Adderall, Risperdal & Lithium) I see my son as the little boy I had always thought he would be.
Loving, caring, smart, athletic, handsome and mischievous like you wouldn't believe - all the things he was but I NEVER COULD
SEE because of the illness.
And so, the little baby with jet black hair whom I called my "Angel
from the Heaven's" before he was even born, to
the handsome, smart, athletic, sincere, jokster boy I know today at age 10 who is happy, healthy and stable, has
been the reason for this website and he has forever, changed our lives, for the better...
God Bless All of you Parents, your work will
never truly be done, and you should be commended for all that you have done and will do for your Angel.
Blessings,
Jen :)
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